Simon Roberts (simonbob) wrote,
Simon Roberts
simonbob

BEST OF 2012 (DELAYED) (CAPSLOCK STYLE)

I DIDN'T GET THE BEST OF 2012 OFF THE GROUND RIGHT AWAY FOR PERSONAL REASONS BUT FUCK THAT LET'S DO THIS THING RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW

"I'M THINKING OF DECLARING PERSONAL BANKRUPTCY," THE MADMAN SAYS TO NOBODY IN PARTICULAR.

I HOOKED YOU GUYS UP! I DESERVE CLOSURE.

I'D LIKE TO PRETEND THIS IS GROUNDBREAKING OR PROFOUND, BUT IT ISN'T. NOBODY'S INTERVIEWING ME. I'M NOT ON TELEVISION.

NOT ALLOWED. VERBOTEN. LOSE ANOTHER EIGHTEEN GAMES PLEASE.

BARK BARK BARK. BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK. BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK.

WE CRY, BECAUSE THERE IS NO MORE WAY FOR US TO KILL OUR FEELINGS.

RIGHT NOW I'M SUPPOSEDLY AWAKE.

NEXT SEASON THE GODS MAY NOT BE SO KIND, SO KEEP YOUR VEINÈD BLADES HANDY, FRIEND.

THIS WAS ORIGINALLY GONNA BE A POST ABOUT HOW I WAS SLOWLY LOSING MY GRIP ON REALITY AND HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS GOING TO DO FOR THE NEXT SIX MONTHS, BUT AS IT TURNS OUT, I'VE TOTALLY GOT A HANDLE ON IT. NO PROBLEM! LIFE IS HILARIOUS.

WE DON'T SEEM TO EXIST TO THEM, AND MAYBE THAT'S OKAY; MAYBE WE JUST NEED TO EXIST TO OURSELVES.

SHUT UP SIMONBOB SHUT UP COYOTE YOU TALK TOO MUCH NOBODY CARES

THIS TROLLEY IS A FUCKIN' TROLLEY WHICH WON'T STOP UNTIL PEOPLE ARE HAVING SEX ON BOARD.

SO I GRAB THE PHONE MYSELF AND CALL AND THE COPS ARE LIKE WE DON'T BELIEVE YOU SINCE YOU ARE CLEARLY DRUNK AND I'M ALL NO I'M NOT BUT I WAKE UP BEFORE I CAN CONVINCE THEM OTHERWISE.

WEED IS GREAT. IT'S ALL THE RELAXING AND FUN PROPERTIES OF DRINKING WITH NONE OF THE ANGER OR BRUTAL SIDE-EFFECTS. I WISH I HAD SOME. I TRIED TAKING A WHOLE BUNCH OF SLEEPING PILLS AT ONCE ONE TIME BUT IT JUST WASN'T THE SAME.

WRITING IS BULLSHIT. I SHOULD'VE BEEN A LINEBACKER.

AND I SAID TO THE WEREWOLVES, YOU ASSHOLES! YOU COULD'VE BITTEN ME SO I'D BE A WEREWOLF TOO!

WHO NEEDS BIG-LEAGUE HOCKEY? WE'VE GOT HOTSHOT YOUNGSTERS PLAYING AT 4 AM LOCAL TIME ON ONLY A WEEK'S ACCLIMATIZATION!

AW MAN, HAS TIM WHARNSBY BEEN SLEEPING ON THIS THING AGAIN?

HE'S A CAT... WHO'S ALSO A RUTABAGA.

FINALLY HE CLOSES THE BOOK TO READ THE COVER: THE "THIEVIUS CÓYOTL". THE GAME ENDS WITH HIM STARING DOWN AND MUTTERING, "THAT'S NOT TRUE... THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!" BEFORE A SUDDEN CUT TO A BLACK SCREEN.

ALSO, LEILA THE CAT WISHES TO REMIND YOU THAT PATS ARE ABHORRENT TO A KITTY-KITTY AND SHE IS THEREFORE TAKING THE GIANTS.
Tags: erstwhile concept art, personal tragedy
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